Lies on dating sites? This may not come as a huge surprise, but when it comes to profiles on dating sites, people tend to lie a lot.
In fact people not only lie, but they lie in ways that make a lot of sense. Most women have a preference for tall men, so men exaggerate their height. On average, by about 2 inches. And if they are close to six feet, they have tendency to round up to six feet. Women also up their height, though this is a bit less obviously advantageous.
The other thing people lie about is how much they earn. This is something that gets worse with age. The older you are the more likely you are to bump up your actual income. By their early fifties lovelorn hopefuls are bigging up their earnings by as much as 20%. This is again a perfectly rational deception. If you are both old and broke you are not going to look like mate potential, and your chances of getting a look in on the on-line dating scene are slim.
Another age related deception is an obvious one. The older you are the more likely your picture is younger than you are. I suppose it must be because you have so many more to choose from. Yes, that must be it.
The most bizarre twist in the story of misleading your audience is that a great many more people claim to be bisexual than actually are. The reasons for this are obscure. Possibly people feel it gives them an aura of daring and open mindedness. Possibly they are so desperate for attention they are willing to seek it from any quarter they can.
So be warned. If you looking for love on the Internet the chances are the folks you are talking to are more weather worn, shorter and poorer than they are letting on in their profile. You probably knew that already, but it is good to know that there are stats to back up your suspicions.
Reference
The information for this post came from a report by OK Cupid, who ought to know about this kind of thing.
http://blog.okcupid.com/index.php/the-biggest-lies-in-online-dating/
Have you heard of the new gene based matching services?
http://www.genepartner.com/
This is taking the concept of being able to scientifically match people up to its logical conclusion via DNA tests.
My recollection of the early dating sites in my 20’s (a while ago now!) that the initial introduction led to a week or so of emailing so you really got to know someone well before actually meeting them.
That’s quite a reverse improvement on meeting someone in a bar I think.
You could always lie about your age, height and wealth – but since the main objective is to meet someone in real life, that does impose a check on the exaggeration potential.
Since you are in contact for a few days before the first meet, this is the opportunity to come clean about any “misspoken” statements. That said, I have a friend who went on a date with a 35 year old handsome floppy haired type, and in walked a bald 60-something….so it does happen!
I recall that the smoking question in particular was never answered that truthfully…..
Non Smoker = Smokes when drunk and on first dates. There were no non-smoking online daters at that time.
Occasional Smoker = 20 a day, and more when drunk. The first date between two occasional smokers was a game of who would give in first and pull out the Marlboro Lights.
Heavy Smoker = Substance abuser. Anyone who would openly admit to being a heavy smoker saw that as the least of their addictions.
Gene based dating sounds intriguing. I don’t know if the technology is up to actually predicting it yet, but there is definitely a chemistry that is sometimes lacking isn’t there.